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How They Met: Debra Rapoport, 75, and Stan Satlin, 82

Debra at Stan found love later in life. They share how they met, and what keeps their relationship strong.

More and more people are meeting and loving later in life. Dating in the digital world is a whole different and often baffling experience from what we grew up with. So much is radically different from texting, sexting, ghosting, and not to mention the whole idea of digital trust. It is a whole new world out there, yet so many of our people are navigating it, finding love and coupling later in life. “How They Met” is a series dedicated to illuminating their stories.

When did you meet?

We first met casually in 2002. Then we re-met in 2007 at an event held by the same friend who originally fixed us up. Something clicked. Timing is everything.

Debra Rapoport and Stan Satlin, photo by Ari Seth Cohen for Advanced Style

Where did you meet?

 

We met because a mutual friend fixed us up. We met at her house for lunch.

What were you thinking before you met? Were you looking for someone to be with?

I wasn’t really looking or wanting a relationship, as my life was full, but this friend insisted. Stan was pretty much in the same place.
 

What were your first impressions? 

My first impression was he was very nice and an interesting guy but…He thought I was nice but not really interested.
 

Where/when were you married?

3 1/2 years ago we became Domestic Partners so we officially moved in together even though we had been living together but maintain 2 households.

Is this the sort of person you were expecting to be with?

Oh yes, absolutely. Years before I made a list of the sort of person I would be interested to be with. As it turned out, he fit the bill. It does make life easier to be in agreement on the important issues in life.
 
What is one of your vices?
 

I am thin-skinned and hurt easily so then I get defensive!

What would you say one of his is?

He doesn’t exercise regularly but does take care of his health!
 
Do you have different cultural backgrounds that may add to your relationship? 
 
We have very similar New York Jewish backgrounds.
 
How do you keep your lives separate, while still being together?
 
We are involved in some different and separate activities and we allow space for us to each follow these. Then we come back together and share our experiences.
 

How are the two of you different? 

I think we are more alike in our values than different.
 

What is the best thing about your relationship?

We agree with most of the important values in life. We share the same attitudes about health and friendship. Neither of us are drama queens and we love keeping our lives simple and easeful. Whenever we might have a disagreement or fight we let all the feelings out and 5 min after, it’s over; all is well.
 

How do you spend your weekends together?

Since we are both retired and freelance artists all days are similar. Saturdays we love going to our local farmers’ market for the delicious and healthy food we want to cook and share together. We both are quite social and love each other’s friends so we meet up, spend time with and dine with friends. We are lucky that we have several friends who are couples we both like. This creates great ease in socializing.
 

What is the best relationship advice you have received or given?

It’s so important to be good friends. It’s so important to have similar values about life, caring, creativity, friends, wealth, and health.
 
Debra was profiled in AGEIST here 
Her Instagram is here.
Stan can be found here.
 
See medical disclaimer below. ↓

10 COMMENTS

  1. Well well well , that is very good news and more importantly hopeful. I am at the point of praying there is life on Mars and maybe I can find a partner there, as Earth has proven manless in the last few years.

  2. Talk about creativity, imagination and depth! These two have it all.
    Companionship is a great thing when it works. Rapport!

  3. Jim and I cherish the time(s) we spend together with you two…interesting, inspiring, easy, and comfortable…what more can you ask?! I’ve always said it’s a gift when you can find another couple where all 4 people play well together!

  4. What a magnificent couple..so full of life and creativity. It is such a pleasure to look at these photos and daydream. Who would have the courage to choose to look like this except us aging folks who still play in life and understand age is only one more chapter. Congratulations Stan and Deborah!!!!

  5. Oh you two are great—Joy, playfulness, beauty! Seeing your photos grants me more freedom of my own expression as an artist, an individual, and loving all that in the people I hold dear. Thank you both!

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The ideas expressed here are solely the opinions of the author and are not researched or verified by AGEIST LLC, or anyone associated with AGEIST LLC. This material should not be construed as medical advice or recommendation, it is for informational use only. We encourage all readers to discuss with your qualified practitioners the relevance of the application of any of these ideas to your life. The recommendations contained herein are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease. You should always consult your physician or other qualified health provider before starting any new treatment or stopping any treatment that has been prescribed for you by your physician or other qualified health provider. Please call your doctor or 911 immediately if you think you may have a medical or psychiatric emergency.

 

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